highline56 op ed

The moment is near, one month to go,
When I will attend the Highline Reunion show.

What do I need to do to make an impression that will matter?
When there are so many others higher on the ladder.

Let me think, there must be a way out of the mist,
I’ve got it now, I’ll make a checklist!

#1. You have to loose weight and watch every calorie,
Start running and sweating and eat lots of celery.
#2. Buy some new clothes that make a fashion statement,
The double knit suit and white shoes will have to go in the basement.
#3. Color you hair to get out the gray,
Use a professional no matter how much you pay.
#4. Start staying up past your normal time for bed,
After eight o’clock you don’t want your eyes rolled back in your head.
#5. Think of things to say that are politically fit,
Get up to date with Paris, Jen, Angelina and Brad Pitt.
#6. Develop recalling names and faces without prodding,
Since your memory doesn’t work, practice smiling and nodding.
#7. Start dancing and moving around to the beat,
Or you will look really stupid falling over your own two feet.
#8. Come up with some stories that could have happened to you,
They will go over big even though they aren’t true.
#9. Make a slide show of the grandkids for all to see,
Don’t forget the video player and TV.
#10. Thank the reunion team for all of their planning and organization,
So that we could be cool for one last occasion.

I have made my list now on to the work,
If I do this just right I won’t look like a jerk.